Puerile Dysfunction

I sold my soul to the devil that’s a crappy deal, least it came with a few toys like a happy meal. — Kanye West

Most of the time, the term “innocuous” describes what I find in Katelyn’s Happy Meal toys.

Right before school, Katelyn scored some mini plastic Skecher shoes that lit up;  these quickly became trinkets on her preschool lunch pail.  (And we didn’t mind the 30% off coupons at the Skecher store…)

Of course, earlier this summer, we got this one (at Left, below):

Pure Scary! Pure Scary!

Suffice to say, it looked like something that escaped from a bad horror film.  Beyond that, mere words fail me.  Not only did Katelyn doth not protest when the disembodied doll head was disappeared from her room, but the wife and I slept a lot better at night.

Most of the time, as I noted above, the toys are innocuous, and quite harmless.  If nothing else, the promotional tie-in with the movie Rio has enabled Kate to wind up with 2/3 of the film’s main characters, and endless imaginative play opportunities in the bath tub.

Yes.  I am trying to put a positive spin on the fact that perhaps my little girl has seen more than her fair share of Golden Arches in the greater Metropolitan area.

Which brings me to this most recent Happy Meal toy she got last week.  Apparently, it’s a promo tie-in with Nickelodeon’s show “iCarly”.  I don’t watch the show, so I have no idea what a daschund has to do with the show.  In any event, you press the tail, and it spins a response.   Katelyn is amused by it, and often forces the wife to repeat the sayings it spouts out while her hair is getting done in the morning.

Here it is:

That's right, it came with an instruction manual!

I only noticed the instructions after Katelyn had grabbed the toy and was running around the house repeating the toy’s inanities.

Perhaps the larger lesson is that we’ve become a country where companies felt we even needed instructions to accompany the toy.  If that’s the case, that’s sad, to say the least.

Sigh.  On the other hand, maybe it was a good thing the disembodied head didn’t come with an instruction sheet.


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